Trying to find the postitive

Our lives are about to change in a big way.

Matthew got web orders not quite two weeks ago, HE will be going to Japan sometime in October for at least one year (possible extension up to two years). This is an unaccompanied tour. So that means Steven and I will not be going with him. We've decided that we will stay in San Clemente, and are currently bouncing around the idea of either staying on base or moving out on town.

Here's my positive on this change of events.

The last time he deployed it was to Iraq, and it wound up being about 12.5 months. He was getting shot at, blown up, not eating much, and living in a location where they didn't have a real chow hall or real bathrooms.

This time he is going to Japan. No one will be shooting at him or trying to blow him up. He will be stuck on a base out in the middle of no where but he will have real food, a real barracks with a roof over his head, and most importantly he will be safe.

I've decided that we need to keep living our lives like normal. Steven and I will stay here in CA. He's starting pre-school, and has friends here. I've got my jobs, friends, and hobbies that keep me happy.

In the next few months I have a few things planned for me to help keep my mood bolstered and have happy healthy goals to shoot for.

1.) Some photo shoots with amazing friends/photographers.
2.) Tough Mudder with Alyx, July 8th or 9th, and sponsored by FRS!!!
3.) Another NPC Bikini contest, July 21st, up in Culver City.
4.) Tickets to see my PACK play the Chargers August 9th!!! I've never seen them play in person and I DO NOT care that its pre-season, I still get to see them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On top of this is figuring out what we're doing about certain things in our lives, like I said we are considering moving off base. I am lucky in the fact that I have a few neighbors who I enjoy the company of - at the same time living on base sometimes feels like you are in a cluster-fuck of a fishbowl. We have to work out how finances are going to work. So that neither Matthew or I fuck up a bill pay cycle or anything of that nature.

I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'm going to basically be a single parent for at least a year. This isn't new in the Marine Corps, but its pretty new to me. The last time Matthew deployed Steven wasn't even born yet, and then was a newborn. Now he's completely aware of things. And there are days that he has meltdowns that Daddy is at work and can't come home right that second. I know we will figure it out and will survive it, but it doesn't mean that I'm looking forward to always having to be the heavy for everything.

I'm hoping that by some magic stroke of luck I might be able to turn my NPC Contests into something that I can make money at... Not sure yet how I want to go about doing it - but seeing as I LOVE what I do. Love the fact that I'm proud of the changes I've made in myself, and also the fact that I have people who are willing to ask me for tips/pointers because they are impressed with what I've done  - I'm interested in seeing if I can turn this into a career somehow.

There is a lot more going on, but this is all the time I have at the moment. Hope you are all doing well. Blessings.