march 25th w pictures

So I'm realizing that while I posted these pictures last Sunday, March 25th, I forgot to include the link on my fb AND never actually wrote a post. So here's a quick one with photos and I'll go rummage up last weeks little workout/meal plan and post that on the bottom. Lots of thing have been running through my head, and not enough time to get them written down. So lets see what I can accomplish tonight :)

*Side note, these pictures are with my AMAZING new suit that is going to be my competition suit***

This week's workout plan, consists of only 3 days which were rotated.

Day 1 & 4

45 minutes Stairmaster

100 Push-ups

100 Incline Push-ups

50 Pull-ups

4 x 25 seated roas w/90lbs

30 minute run

Day 2 & 5

30 minute bike

100 Squats w/weight bar

(3 x 33) x 3 Smith machine calves w/40lbs on bar

100 Deep squat jumps to bench

100 Plyo-lunges

100 Dead lifts straight legs w/weight bar

45 minute stairmaster

Day 3 & 6

1 hour Run

5 x 5 minute planks

250 crunches

250 Sit-ups

250 Oblique twists

1 hour stairmaster

This week we also alternated 2 days for meal plans. Trying to change things up a little and sculpt the body a bit more.

Day 1

Protein shake, 1 small serving of fruit

Veggies 1 cup (serving), protein 3 oz

Protein x 2 (6-8oz), Veggies 1 cup

Veggies 1 cup, Protein 3 oz

Protein x 3 (10-12 oz)

Protein 3oz

Day 2

Protein shake, 1 tbs peanut butter or 1 8 oz glass of LIGHT soy milk (I stuck with the PB, because I wasn't sure if I could keep from drinking too much soy milk)

Veggies 1 cup, Protein 3 oz

Protein x 3 (10-12oz)

Protein x 2 (6-8oz), Veggies 1 cup

Protein x 3 (10-12 oz)

Protein 3 oz

NOT OVER 1,200 calories either day!!!

Allowed - vinegar, mustard, 0 calorie cheats = lemon/lime juice, 0 calorie energy drinks. 2 x Rice Cakes a day if dying with a salty type seasoning/I can't believe its not butter spray.

Offensive

So I know I made a brief status update on FB earlier today regarding my T-shirt and the reaction it got at the gym... I'm still kind of surprised by it.

I wore it last Friday on my early day to the gym, the 5 am crew definitely got more of a giggle out of it. Maybe its because no one was awake enough yet to be offended by it, or maybe its because they seem to be a group of people who are more dedicated to their workouts (they are there at 5am).

And most people today didn't say anything about it, but I had two older gentlemen comment on it. One I consider a friend, and he just thought it wasn't something that I should be wearing that I was "Better than a shirt like that, and I need to keep my husband's career in mind.". To him I said thank you, and that I'd take that into consideration. The other guy though... He was a bit more in my face, and definitely got my Irish up.

I didn't even realize that anyone had an issue with my shirt until one of the guys who works there came up and made a point of reading my shirt while I was in the middle of my set of seated rows. He just said, "Oh, thats what the old fart meant." and moved on. Next thing I know I've got this guy in my face.

Telling me that "I'm what's wrong with society today. Pushing these words in people's faces. Not caring about how they may feel about profanity. That it isn't just confined to the gym, and around the community, but that it carries up and into our politics and governing forces." And blah, blah, blah (honestly at some point I tuned him out) I thanked him for his opinion, and that he had the right to it, but that it was my shirt and I could choose to wear it if I wanted to.

This was done after deep breathing and counting to 10 in my head :)

What I wanted to do was tell him to shove it. That if he couldn't fucking appreciate a little bit of fucking humor on a damn t-shirt then he was a douche-bag of the Nth degree and needed to go crawl into a little tiny black hole with his lack of fucking humor.

:)

I really truly have no respect for people who feel like they need to preach, and every instinct I had was screaming at me to poke fun at this poor, obviously unhappy, old man.

I wanted to ask him if he believed in God, or prayer in schools, or if it was alright to say "Gosh-darn!" in public... Mainly because I wanted to go into antagonistic mode and just poke him with a stick - even if it was me going against something I believed just because I found it rude the way that he chose to speak to me.

Obviously I didn't do any of these things, and most of them popped into mind after I was done with him.

Other people in the gym saw/overheard it and came up to tell me they thought the shirt was funny. And people that know my story, know how much I've done on my own through blood, sweat, and tears think that its an appropriate shirt.

If I've offended you with this post, or with the t-shirt... I'm not really sorry. I've spent too much of my life censoring what I do/say because it "might offend someone". I'm not going to go out of my way to be shocking, but I'm not going to NOT wear a T-shirt because someone's feelings might get hurt...

Love to you all, I'm going to go enjoy a nice steak before heading off to work tonight :)

Sunday March 18th

Another early morning photo shoot at Miss Alyx's apartment. We decided to skip going to Starbucks or Tea leaf & Coffee Bean, and just do tea at her place so that we could do photos, workout plan/meal plan, girl talk etc without dealing with other people being around.

Really getting into the nit-pick stage of body refining, trying to isolate certain body parts - especially when you've never trained like this - is difficult. Both Alyx and I aren't sure how quickly my body will respond and honestly its kind of a pain. Trying to get this to time out perfectly with the competition in 4 weeks, so that I don't hit anything too early and have to try and maintain a plateau is going to take some work. Neither of us are still really happy with my upper/inner thigh region (frankly I've got to admit that I don't think I'll ever be happy with that portion of my body), the low abs could still use some work, and I want to tighten up my low back. AND always the butt. Its ridiculous how important the BUTT is.

And its ridiculous how much I'm starting to feel the loss of my carbs. Last night Matthew and I got a chance to go out for a little while without Steven, Alyx watched him for us so we could go eat a meal without having little person chatter the whole time. We went out for Sushi, well Matthew got sushi and I got Sushimi, which I do enjoy but at the same time not allowing myself to have the option for anything else I was kind of bummed about. I more than ate my fill of raw fish, really good raw fish, but I was craving something more... I texted Alyx and asked her what I could have that would be a "cheat" but not be awful. FRUIT was her answer. Usually I'd be like whattt? Thats a cheat?! But right now it so is! So I enjoyed an orange and didn't feel guilty for it.

I'm realizing that I really need to plan ahead in everything. Having pre-made snacks put together in my bag really helps so that if my blood sugar starts to drop I can munch and make it through. Otherwise I start to get very irritable, moody, and tired. It was explained to me that I basically have to think of myself as PMS'ing from now until the show. Fun times! Especially for those around me.

Even as I'm typing this I'm feeling myself start to phase a bit, and I'm having a harder time collecting my thoughts to get them down. Hold on, I'll be back in a bit after I grab some veggies and protein to eat.

Better.

I figure this is a place that I can be honest about things, like how my body really isn't enjoying this diet. Its so high in protein that I'm having to make sure that I'm getting enough fiber. I've never had a problem with that before, but I have to be really careful with my veggies now to make sure that everything keeps working correctly.

I'm also learning to fix different things, like tofu, to keep things interesting. I've eaten it before, but never cooked with it in its "natural" state so going to Alyx's and seeing her just whip up savory breakfasts and other nummy items has been a big help. Today for lunch I decided to make a quick stir-fry with a leftover chicken breast, sweet bell peppers, onions and garlic. SO yummy, and probably something I wouldn't have thought to do before. Made it with a batch of mashed cauliflower because I wanted yummy comfort food due to this icky weather.

Yeah, yeah I said it. ICKY weather! I'm not sure when it happened, if its a product of living here for 3+ years or if its because my body fat % is so low, but I'm actually feeling COLD. The wind and rain the last two days has not been fun... Right about now the thought of getting stationed in Hawaii is sounding kind of awesome!

Anyways, enough of my rambling for the moment, here are today's photos - what you can't see are the goosebumps covering most of me. I was in and out of that bikini as quick as possible so that I could be warm wearing clothing :)

I'm happy with the definition I'm getting in my quads, and that in my back/arms. Once I'm all tan I think things will pop really well.

This weeks workout plan.

Monday:

10 min warmup

Pull-ups till Fail x 3

Squats till fail x 3

Plyo lunges till fail x 3

Push-ups till fail x 3

In and Out Squat Jump till fail x 3

Burpees till Fail x 3

45 mins Stairs

Tuesday:

1 hour run

30 min stairs

30 min bike

(10 min abs at home of my choice)

Wednesday:

10 min warmup

Pull-ups to fail x 3

Lat Pull-downs w/80lbs x 15 reps x 3 sets

Seated Row w/80lbs x 15 reps x 3 sets

Smith calfs w/50lbs on bar (33 regular calves, 33 pigeon toe, 33 penguin) x 3

66 Push-ups x 3

45 min run - slow, 3% incline

Thursday:

30 min stairs

1 hour run

30 min abs - 10 minute plank, 5 minute sit-ups, 5 min bike crunches, 5 min twisting crunch, 5 min oblique twists (Never stop, Don't QUIT)

Friday:

1 hour stairs

And this week I get 2 days of rest. No yoga, no outdoor run, nothing for both Saturday and Sunday.

Meal Plan

Wake-up/Pre-gym: Protein, 1 serving of berries

Post Gym: Protein, veggies

Snack: Protein

Lunch: Protein, veggies

Mid-day snack: Protein

Dinner: Protein x 2, veggies

Shooting for calories to be around 1,200 a day. And my "cheat" snack is a serving of baby carrots!

Its interesting to me when I talk with people. They either can't believe that I'm surviving on so little food, or the fact that I have very few carbs in my diet (other than those that are naturally occurring).

Yes I realize that to use this as an everyday "guideline" would be ridiculous, but for a short period of time, prepping for this contest, its perfectly fine. I'm making sure I'm taking my supplements and getting all of my needed vitamins/minerals. Yes I'm crankier than normal, and yes I tend to get tired easier. But I'm doing this with a goal in mind.

I don't think there is one single thing wrong with having a healthy goal, ie competition/race/etc and doing the most you can to achieve it. This past week when Alyx took my bikini photos after I got the spray tan I couldn't believe how night and day I felt about this competition. I'd started to have those little self doubts, your too fat still, you don't have enough definition still, you'll never be pretty enough to compete with those other women... blah blah blah.

BUT I put on those ridiculous heels, a bikini over top of my new tan, and felt AMAZING! I really truly felt beautiful. Like I have a something to be proud of in my journey. I know some people don't understand this, but on the day to day, its hard to remember just how far I've come. I live in this skin. I look down everyday and see my thighs, and at times to me they still look like a solid size 10-12...

But I get those moments, those glimpses of what other people might see... And it shocks me. I'm sitting here at the computer wearing a size 1 pair of jeans. Since the day I became aware of sizes, and how much you actually do get judged on your appearance, I have NEVER been a size 1. Hell, until recently I hadn't been a size 6! I don't think I plan on trying to maintain this size, mainly because I miss things like apples. But if I can find a comfortable/healthy weight/size range that allows me to maintain a 4/6 I think I will be a happy happy camper after all of this is said and done.

Enough of my rambling for now. I need to get into the kitchen and get tonight's dinner of Spaghetti squash, spaghetti sauce (which I wont be eating), pesto (which I will be eating), and salad going. Night everyone!

Bikini waxing

Ok so I've been debating on whether I was going to post about this - but figure since I'm posting about everything else, Why not?

Back when I started thinking about doing this competition I contemplated getting a bikini/brazilian wax done. I've NEVER had anything other than my eyebrows waxed, and the thought of having someone other than a partner or my gyno down in my "area" is/was a bit nerve wracking. After a lot of discussions with women who have done them, and the girl who actually does the waxing at the spa I decided to go with it.

What the HELL was I thinking?!?!?!!!!!

What are other women thinking?!?!?!!!!

Why would you EVER pay someone else to put hot wax on your "area" and RIP IT OFF!!!!!!!

I remember seeing a video clip a few years ago, that showed women from about the sternum up and their reactions to having things waxed... NOW I understand.

We had figured out a timeline for waxing, backdating from my event to when we were planning on starting. I have to admit, I only did the one time. There is NO way you could convince me to go back - at least not right now.

Maybe if you paid me.

BUT it would have to be a lot of $$$, and you'd have to have a HUGE glass of wine waiting for me. AND a box of my favorite chocolate truffles.

I know some women say that it isn't that bad, and there are those who not only do brazilians but do their legs, armpits, etc... I'll pass. If I'm hairy I'll shave. Or I'll deal with being hairy. Figuring out how to backdate shaving at this point, but if it means that I don't have to worry about having hot wax near my nether regions I'm totally ok with it :)

Sunday March 11th

Life is still interesting here in my house. I've determined that I'm going to be moody off and on until the competition, and that my body is going to have issues keeping me warm. We said goodbye to Grandma this week, and Steven has been beside himself, asking for her each day, wondering why we can't see her or go to her house right that very second. I had a couple of rough days this last week, between the workouts lack of calories, and sleep schedules I've been tired and cranky.

I'm trying my best to try and gather my thoughts for this weeks update. I thought I'd had it mapped out in my head yesterday, but things have gotten a bit jumbled again. Super fun update, I went and bought 2 new pairs of shoes for working out! My Vibrams and my Sauconys were both starting to wear out, to the point of not being all that good to workout in - still usable for yard work/walking the dog type activities but not good for the miles that I've been putting on my body. I technically didn't buy either pair either! My friends Alyx and Kris felt the need to thank me somehow for taking care of their pooch, Briggs, while they were gone during the holiday season. And had mentioned a while ago about buying me a pair of new shoes. Alyx got tired of me hemming and hawwing so she finally asked what my shoes normally cost and wrote me a check for the amount, and because I happened to luck out and hit an AWESOME sale, plus VIP discounts, plus Clearance on my Vibrams... I managed to get 2 pairs of shoes out of that $$$.

This afternoon I went over to Alyx's and did my weekly photos, and meal plan/workout plan updates. The photos that follow are the usual see progress photos, PLUS a few "pose" photos. I really need to start training on the pose and also walking in the heels for the competition. Right now I have a pair of CRAZY stripper heals that I borrowed from Leslie, and we're (Alyx and I) are trying to find out if they fit into regulation for heels. If they do, then I'm going to start training my walk in them, along with hitting the poses I need to hit.

I have never been so conscience of walking in a pair of heels, and how each step affects the way that I look. Trying to remember to suck this part in, or push that part out... Flex these muscles at this moment, and those at another... Going to take a lot of work. So onto the photos. PLEASE ignore the messy bun, and the fact that I was NOT prepared to do any Pose photos this morning, Alyx threw that one at me once I was in front of the camera. Also we've determined that even if I don't wind up competing in my blue bikini that I do need to start bringing it with me for these photo updates because it will be closer in cut to what I'll wear for the competition than the black suit that I've been using.

This week the focus is going to be more centered on my lower core, the gluteal region, and the upper thigh region (mainly back upper thigh). There are other areas that need work, ie my shoulders, but we're saving those until closer to the competition so that I'm not trying to maintain the look from 4 weeks out.

Speaking of X number of weeks from the competition. As of yesterday, March 10th, I was exactly 5 weeks from the DAY of competition. I'm starting to get nervous. I feel like I've got a TON of work to do before then. I'm hoping that in the next week I do my first round of fake tan to see how the color is (I promise I'll post pictures) and also to see if it really does make a difference in the definition. I keep getting told that once I'm darker that my muscle definition will really POP and that I need to do it so that all my hard work doesn't wind up looking "pancaked" under the stage lights. Honestly I'm almost having a harder time with the idea that I have to go super dark, than the dieting or the working out.

I've NEVER been tan before, Burnt yes, but never had a tan in my life. My biggest goal is to not look like an Umpa-Lumpa when I get done getting sprayed. No Snookie for me please!!! :)

Onto this weeks meal plan/workout plan.

Meals:

Breakfast - Protein shake, tea, and 1 small serving of fruit (lowest sugar content)

Post Gym - Tuna

Lunch - Protein (Fish, chicken) x 2, Veggies

Snack - Steak (or other protein), Veggies

Dinner - Protein (fish, chicken, beans, beef) x 3

Post 7pm - Green Veggies

Water, Tea with Lemon/Stevia, Guilt free Lemonade, 0 Calorie Energy Drinks are all good. NO DRESSINGS on anything, so spices will become my friends. Adding lemon to as much as possible is great, Lemon is a natural calorie burner. And I can have 1/2 an avacado a day, or 1 serving of nuts if I'm needing the fats.

Workout.

Monday:

Single leg dead lifts w/8lb free weights, 3 x 25 each side

Straight leg dead lifts w/weight bar, 3 x 50

Leap Frogs, 3 x length of gym and back

Box jumps starting from Deep squat, 3 x 50

Sitting Leg Press, 3 x Failure at 120lbs+

25-30 minute cardio

Tuesday:

1.5 hours Cardio my choice - mix it up and get sweaty

Wednesday:

50 Burpee Pullups

50 Burpee Pushups, 8 count

50 Burpee Dead & Front Squat

50 Burpee Frog jumps

50 Burpee Plyo Jump to Bench

50 Burpees Regular

Thursday:

1 hour run

1 hour stairs

Friday:

5 x 21's w/12lbs (7 Regular curls, 7 top curls, 7 low curls)

5 x 20-25 bench dips

5 x 10-15 Frontal & Lateral shoulder raises 10-15lbs

5 x 20 Renegade rows 20-25lbs

5 x 20 Push-ups

5 x Failure Pull-ups

Saturday:

1 hour Yoga (SOOOOO Happy because I didn't get to do Yoga on Saturday and it was supposed to be my last time to do Yoga until the competition)

30 Minute Outdoor Run

Sunday:

REST (Play with Steven and Matthew)

Honestly I know I'm going to be in pain during this week, not one day is easy, and the combination of these days together is going to be killer. But I'm looking forward to it. I'm NOT looking forward to the fact that I lost my 1 apple a day :( but I did go to Mother's today when we went up to Runner's World and got a new flavor of Spiru-tein Protein powder, Cookies & Cream, so we'll find out just how horrendous it is. I'm just burnt on Chocolate.

I have a feeling the next few weeks are going to be spent with a lot of time at the gym (duh) but a lot of time in front of this computer looking at videos of other competitions. Also looking for tips/pointers, checking out shoes, suits, and anything else that might help me. I'm blown away by some of these women who do this as a career. Their bodies are amazing, and I couldn't imagine maintaining this for most of the year.

I'm fantasizing about things like bagels. Already working on my "Post-competition Fat girl meal plan" for at least the first few days post April 14th :) I've got a lot of other thoughts bouncing around in my head right now, but I'm feeling exhausted from the last couple of days, so I think I'll end this here and maybe try to get back on in a day or two when I've had time to sort through thoughts before just throwing them onto my blog here. Love!

Week 3 Workout/Diet Plan

*Forgot to post this weeks Workout/Diet plan with the latest update.*

(The ^ symbol will be used to show pyramid sets)

Monday:

Dropset Bar Curls 50/40/30/20lb 3 sets x 10 reps each

Lat Pull Downs ^

Renegade Rows 3 sets x 20 each side w/20-25lb free weights

Cable Curls ^

Bent Flys 3 sets x 15 w/10-15lb free weights

Hammer Curls 3 x 25 w/15-20lb free weights

Laying leg lifts as many sets as possible

30 minutes Stairs

Tuesday:

30/30/30 Cardio

- 30 Treadmill

- 30 Elliptical

- 30 Bike/Stairs

Wednesday:

250 Squats

250 Lunges

250 Laying Leg Press

250 Laying Leg Press Calf Raises

250 Machine Leg Press

250 Standing Calf Raises

30 Minute Run - 4 miles or more

Thursday:

3 x 7 minute plank ( front/sides/up-downs whatever I have to do without setting down)

1,000 abs of any variation

45 minutes on Bike

Friday:

6 mile run or more

Saturday:

1 hour yoga (Last one before Competition)

30-45 minute outdoor run

MEAL PLAN

Wake up: 1 apple, 1 protein shake, tea

Post gym: 1 can tuna

Snack: 2 cups veggies

Lunch: 1 slice fish/serving of protein

Snack: 2 cups veggies

Dinner: 2 servings chicken or beef or fish, 2 cups veggies

Lifesaver (in case of emergencies) 1 protein shake

Day 15

Oops! Missed Sunday nights update - oh well, my MIL is in visiting and I just had lots going on :)

This last week was crazy, I felt a huge difference in my body. I stuck to my diet 100%, no cheats, and I felt like between the killer/crazy workouts and the diet I could actually see a difference in just one week. Things really seemed to tighten up around my mid-section, and a bit in the upper thigh region.

Sunday was a bit crazy, got up early and picked up Alyx to go for tea/coffee, write up this weeks plan, farmer's market, commissary shopping, and then beach with the family for most of the rest of the day.

So we took photos early, like before eating/drinking anything early...

I'm having a bit of a hard time centering my thoughts right now, I just feel like so much has been going on and I've hardly had a chance to stop and catch my breath. Plus add in the lack of calories, and the not enough sleep that I've gotten in the last few days and my brain just isn't really up to 100% at the moment.

I've noticed that I've been a bit more fragile lately, emotion wise, and also have been quicker to get pissy/angry/moody. I feel bad for Matthew and Steven because I realize that they catch the brunt of it since they live with me.

Ex: Saturday night, Matthew and I decided to take advantage of Janice being in town to watch Steven and we went on a date night. The movie we chose "Act of Valor", is admittedly not a happy/fun movie, but even for me I feel like I was brought easier to tears. We went for sushi (sashimi for me) afterwards, and then went to Goody's for drinks. I got pissy because A.)Even though I'm not much of a drinker, I've chosen to put myself in a position where I can't drink for the next few weeks B.) Because of A, I was wayyy to sober to deal with most of the people in the bar C.) I felt ignored by Matthew (the bar was so loud you could barely hear anyone speak) D.) I was just being whiny and wanted to go home

None of which was Matthew's fault, but I was just being bratty.

We argued last night, after Steven went to bed. A lot of it was personal stuff between us, but part of it had to do with this new venture that I'm pursuing. The fact that I'm spending a lot of time either at the gym/yoga studio/running outdoors/at Alyx's checking in with what to do/etc. I gave into emotional eating and indulged in a couple of GirlScout cookies, and then felt disgusted and angry with myself afterwards.

Its hard on everyone when a partner chooses to do something this extreme. I've never tried to limit myself like this calorie wise and then add in the workout programs that I'm doing... And its time consuming. What I'm able to eat is very different then things Matthew and Steven might want to eat. It isn't fair to limit them to chicken, and spinach salads every night yet at the same time I find it hard to cook some foods for them because all I want to do is give in and cheat.

Not only is it hard food wise, but it also may take away from family time. This last week I took advantage of having Janice in town, and using Friday as an example, I went to work that morning at Dr. S's then went straight to the gym and didn't push myself to get through everything in less than 2 hours because Janice was home with Steven and I didn't have a time constraint because of the childcare at the gym.

We're slowly figuring out the dynamics of me doing this. I'm not sure if after this competition I'd do another, I wont count it out - I want to see what the results of this is first before I say anything one way or another.

I'm realizing this post is sort of rambling. And at the moment I'm not really feeling like fixing it. I'll come back and up-date the post with photos when I get them from Alyx, and maybe in a day or two I'll come back and make another post when my thoughts are a bit more centered.